Practical solutions to life's adventure, according to children.

Received in an e-mail. Advice on life as proposed by children of varying ages.

• Never trust a dog to watch your food. - Patrick, aged 10.
• When your dad is mad and asks "Do I look stupid?" don't answer. - Hannah, aged 9.
• Never tell your mum her diet's not working. - Michael, aged14.
• Stay away from prunes. - Randy, aged 9.
• Don't squat with your spurs on. - Noronha, aged 13.
• Don't pull dad's finger when he tells you to. - Emily, aged 10.
• When your mum is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair. - Taylia, aged 11.
• Never allow your three-year old brother in the same room as your school assignment. - Traci, aged 14.
• Don't sneeze in front of your mum when you're eating crackers. - Mitchell, aged 12.
• Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a Tic Tac. - Andrew, aged 9.
• Never hold a dust-buster and a cat at the same time. - Kyoyo, aged 9.
• You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk. - Armir, aged 9.
• Don't wear polka dotted underwear under white shorts. - Kellie, aged 11.
• If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse. - Naomi, aged 15.
• Felt pens are not good to use as lipstick. - Lauren, aged 9.
• Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat. - Joel, aged 10.
• When you get a bad grade at school, show it to your mum when she's on the phone. - Alyesha, aged 13.

Now, why didn't I think of that?